As a humanist celebrant, I was saddened by Rachel Connolly’s conclusion about humanist weddings (What makes a good wedding these days? I say flirting and chaos, but not three days in a French castle, 29 July). She writes: “The idea of being married in a humanist service by someone wearing, say, skinny jeans and a black T-shirt gives me willies.” I must disclose my ownership of several pairs of skinny jeans, but I have not worn these in my role as a celebrant (though never say never – I’m always guided by couples’ dress codes).

Ms Connolly seems to have the impression that a humanist ceremony represents a compromise to the formal and ceremonial rituals we’d traditionally associate with a religious wedding. On the contrary, humanist celebrants are knowledgable, passionate and unashamedly geeky about creating meaningful non-religious ceremonies that are deeply personal to couples and their families.

A non-religious ceremony needn’t be unceremonious or casual. I’d love for Ms Connolly to come to one of our weddings to see what the fuss is about, especially with the forthcoming legalisation of humanist marriage ceremonies.
Mair Garland
London